Things keep repeating itself again. I dont know why, but somehow nothing can make me happy now... since long I have lost my innerself... I started being emo then.... well all my life, I've been going through lies and other goddamn stuffs... (hell if u guys dont wan to read it dont read, it's my blog and I'd write whatever hell do I wan to). Even when you guys saw me have a good time and laugh all I wanted... I'd just give a fake smile and laugh... there's nothing that can make me have the real smile back... for the real me is dead inside a long time ago... its like a shell carrying me around lifeless.... I'd better just let this sickness of mine kill me instead... slowly beating to its own death.... Those of u who know that only thing that can make me feel happy and alive back.... I dont need to say a thing now.. I know I have to study for account... but.... bah, no1 cares a goddam thing I said anyhow... whatever.

Signing off,
Gary

soooooo free ah?

Me neither~~ I dont know why am I that free to post my blogs when it's SPM day... should be studying account.... but dont have the mood, yeap, just now went to watch Twilight: New Moon, not bad, not like most of those vampire love stories... among all those this one, I'd give 2 thumbs up (If I had 10 I would XD). when the part Jacob wanna kiss Bella (which he didnt get it, poor bastard, I dont feel sorry for him XD) those girls seating bottom... suddenly scream *KISS ME!!!!* wtf la, go back to america, find that Taylor Lautner guy and kiss him la *shish* whatever... Oh, I went with Audrey and Arthur (since Jacky cant come, had to call him~~) hmm.. A and A .... LOL JUST REALISED THAT~~~~ damn reservation ... have to take the ticket 45 minutes earlier from the time of the show... gawd~~ Audrey blame me for not goin to take the tickets earlier~~ and start to get pissed off and say wanna go home~~ luckily we managed to get the tickets but have to sit seperatly..... saw Scott and his sis.... and before you know it, when the show start, Audrey message me "Oh my god, TSL is sitting right in front of me now." turned and saw her with another guy.... (lovebirds~~) the place is packed with lots of people la... mostly ALL is couple... (why cant I have it right now... HAIZ) but then.... damn missed my chance to get to know her... GAWD, nope I'm not blaming u Audrey XD... HAHA

Glen Medeiros - Nothing's gonna change my love for you

If I had to live my life without you near me
The days would all be empty
The nights would seem so long
With you I see forever oh so clearly
I might have been in love before
But it never felt this strong
Our dreams are young and we both know
They'll take us where we want to go
Hold me now, touch me now
I don't want to live without you

CHORUS:
Nothing's gonna change my love for you
You ought to know by now how much I love you
One thing you can be sure of
I'll never ask for more than your love
Nothing's gonna change my love for you
You ought to know by now how much I love you
The world may change my whole life through
But nothing's gonna change my love for you

If the road ahead is not so easy
Our love will lead a way for us
Like a guiding star
I'll be there for you if you should need me
You don't have to change a thing
I love you just the way you are
So come with me and share the view
I'll help you see forever too
Hold me now, touch me now
I don't want to live without you

CHORUS

Thats all I can say now

Peace out Y'all
Gary

6 down ... 4 more to the doors of freedom

GOOD NEWS FOR ME AND MY FRIENDS~~~~~ 6 subjects down and 4 more~~~ (3 for u guys =.=, damn u guys.... ) then after this... its goodbye school ( I'll miss it ) and hello new world~~~ haha, I havent decide where to continue my studies (maybe) but then... see my results 1st~~~ THANK YOU GOD (I hope) I THINK I GOT 30 FREE 30 MARKS ON ADD MATHS PAPER 2!!! XD, weeeeeeeeee. Bah, enough of this, if later backfire, I malu.

Avenged Sevenfold - Dear God

A lonely road, crossed another cold state line
Miles away from those I love purpose hard to find
While I recall all the words you spoke to me
Can't help but wish that I was there
Back where I'd love to be, oh yeah

Dear God the only thing I ask of you is
to hold her when I'm not around,
when I'm much too far away
We all need that person who can be true to you
But I left her when I found her
And now I wish I'd stayed
’Cause I'm lonely and I'm tired
I'm missing you again oh no
Once again

There's nothing here for me on this barren road
There's no one here while the city sleeps
and all the shops are closed
Can't help but think of the times I've had with you
Pictures and some memories will have to help me through, oh yeah

Dear God the only thing I ask of you is
to hold her when I'm not around,
when I'm much too far away
We all need that person who can be true to you
I left her when I found her
And now I wish I'd stayed
’Cause I'm lonely and I'm tired
I'm missing you again oh no
Once again

Some search, never finding a way
Before long, they waste away
I found you, something told me to stay
I gave in, to selfish ways
And how I miss someone to hold
when hope begins to fade...

A lonely road, crossed another cold state line
Miles away from those I love purpose hard to find

Dear God the only thing I ask of you is
to hold her when I'm not around,
when I'm much too far away
We all need the person who can be true to you
I left her when I found her
And now I wish I'd stayed
’Cause I'm lonely and I'm tired
I'm missing you again oh no
Once again

For those of u who understand the meaning of this song.... It speaks through here~~

AMEN! XD

Ciao y'all
Gary

Stand as a broken man

Boys Like Girls - Broken Man
I want to scream, until no sound comes out and you've learned your lesson
I want to swallow these pills to get to sleep
So I don't have to make a bad impression

I need to start to be myself
Cause I'm sick of everybody else

I won't let you bring me down
It's here and now I'm breaking out
I will learn to love again
But I will stand a broken man

I wanna run, but only far enough to make you miss me
I wanna take back all the shit that I have done
But I guess you were better off without me

I need to start to be myself
Cause I'm sick of everybody else

I won't let you bring me down
It's here and now, I'm breaking out
I will learn to love again
But I will stand a broken man

I took one big step and I looked away
And then I thought of all the things that I wanted to say
I'm always too late
You never got your story straight
I'm always up late
I think I'm everything you hate

I took one big step and I looked away
And then I thought of all the things that I wanted to say
I'm always too late
You never got your story straight
I'm always up late
I think I'm everything you hate

I took one big step and I looked away
And then I thought of all the things that I wanted to say
I'm always too late
You never got your story straight
I'm always up late
I think I'm everything you hate

I won't let you bring me down
It's here and now, I'm breaking out
I will learn to love again
But I will stand a broken man

(I took one big step and I looked away, and I thought of all the things that I wanted to say)
I won't let you bring me down
(I'm always too late, you never got your story straight, I'm always up late, I think I'm everything you hate)
It's here and now I'm breaking out
(I took one big step and I looked away, and I thought of all the things that I wanted to say)
I will learn to love again
(I'm always too late, you never got your story straight)
But I will stand a broken man

Yup... the song speaks for itself so I dont need to say anything today... dont feel like expressing today... just this pic...

BABY RAPES DOLLS!!!! XDXP

Ciao y'all,
Gary

The Mask Within Me (Bleach)

LOL, I'm just putting a pic thats all XD, yeah... Maths was easy la... but like experiences teached me in the past. Dont underestimate anything in life, eventhough it looks easy, it could be a deadly trap that is ready to spring and kill u~~~ lolz XD talking shit here I know~~ P.moral 2mr.... just study some la, since I'm gonna fluck it -.- *shish*

THIS MOVIE I MUST WATCH (sabar la, 4 more months WTF LAAAA!!!) GAARRR MUST WATCH!!!!

Okay, this movie takes place somewhere in the middle eastern... lots of action, cool places, and yeah... its impossible but the title and the movie speaks itself, Prince Dastan ( Jake Gyllenhaal ) who soon obtain the dagger of time, learn that some baddies wanna take the dagger and DESTROY THE WORLD with sandstorm... (thats the best they can get to offer??) anyway the prince soon learn the real power of the dagger of time, which REWINDS time and defy death itself and team up with a rival princess, Tamina (Gemma Arteton) and set off on a journey full of danger and excitement~~~ the rest is up to you to watch it ~~ XD HAHA

Ciao y'all
Gary

My cinderella~~~~

LOL STUPID LA, my brother and I talked about the girl I liked, mana tahu suddenly call her cinderella -.-||| but I like it ~~~ XXDD I'M HYPER BABY!!! WOO!!!

Something in me changed le ... I'm not being emo again ~~ YAY (is that a good thing?) and I got lesser problems... yeah yeah 2day's my birthday~~~ haha had a self celebration on myself (since parents go to church and hospital to visit my uncle...) so its just left over pizza (birthday cake) and mashed potato (for dessert) the real cake they bought it yesterday at strawberry after dinner at upperstar.... damn la, WHY cant they like give me some suprise??? ALWAYSSSS have to buy in front of me, ask me wat cake and then I have to smile there and say " O " haiz..... but not their fault also la... ( well still, cause they have to do it 9 MONTHS LATE??? WHY I HAVE TO BE BORN IN 22nd NOVEMBER 1992!!! CANT IT BE EARLIER??!! LOLZ, I'm blaming on how slow they had to do it here~~~ XD) and also SPM session lo now -.-, like audrey said in her blog, celebrate IT after SPM~~~ beers, shisha and cakes (dont forget the fries) yup, its either at the bars at tanjung aru.... hmm... fireworks... still in progress on that ~~

I'm happy as I used to be ... but I dont know is that a good thing... celebrating my birthday, without somebody special... not something to be happy about... but whats done is done... I cant get another chance... maybe, after death me itself.

OH and jacky, if you're reading this, dont tell ANY1 about my sickness... CAPISH?!

Adios amigos~~
Gary

Jesse McCartney - Take you sweet time
It isn't a crime to want
A little space to breathe
But you will be fine,The sun again will shine
On you
Whatever you do

(Chorus)
Take your sweet,sweet time
Cuz I'll be here, when you change your mind
Take your sweet,sweet time
I'll be here for you baby
Anytime

I'm feeling you pull away
'Cause letting go isn't easy for me
But you'll never fly
With someone else's wings,I know
Wherever you go

(Chorus)
Take your sweet,sweet time
I'll be here, when you change your mind
Take your sweet,sweet time
I'll be here for you baby
Anytime

I will never stand in your way
Whereever your heart may lead you
I will love you the same
And I will be your comfort everyday
Do you hear the words I say

(Chorus)
Take your sweet,sweet time
I'll be here (I'll be here)when you change your mind
Take your sweet,sweet time
I'll be here for you baby
Take your sweet,sweet time
I'll be here when you change your mind
Take your sweet,sweet time
I'll be here for you baby
Anytime

Oh, I'll be here, for you
I will be here
I~~~~~~~~oh I'll be here
I will be here

Boyzone - Everyday I love you

I don't know but I believe
That some things are meant to be
And that you'll make a better me
Everyday I love you
I never thought that dreams came true
But you showed me that they do
You know that I learn somethng new
Everyday I love you
'Cos I believe that destiny
Is out of our control (don't you know that I do)
And you'll never live until you love
With all your heart and soul.
It's a touch when I feel bad
It's a smile when I get mad
All the little things I am
Everyday I love you
Everyday I love you boy
Everyday I love you
'Cos I believe that destiny
Is out of our control (don't you know that I do)
And you'll never live until you love
With all your heart and soul
If I asked would you say yes?
Together we're the very best
I know that I am truly blessed
Everyday I love you
And I'll give you my best
Everyday I love you

I'm just being lifeless here posting songs and shits HAHA... Oh crap that reminds me ... 2mr is my birthday... not a happy 1 I would expect... haha who cares anyway... I can wish myself happy birthday... nop, no party, SPM time how can -.-... great... 1 digit to raise on my life cap ( SHIT I'M GETTING OLD!!!! did I lost my virginity lately?) XD the fuck la, UUUUU SHISA!! XP

Ciao y'all,
Gary

All american rejects - It ends tonight
Your subtleties
They strangle me
I can't explain myself at all.
And all the wants
And all the needs
All I don't want to need at all.

The walls start breathing
My mind's unweaving
Maybe it's best you leave me alone.
A weight is lifted
On this evening
I give the final blow.

When darkness turns to light,
It ends tonight
It ends tonight.

A falling star
Least I fall alone.
I can't explain what you can't explain.
You're finding things that you didn't know
I look at you with such disdain

The walls start breathing
My mind's unweaving
Maybe it's best you leave me alone.
A weight is lifted
On this evening
I give the final blow.

When darkness turns to light
It ends tonight,
It ends tonight.
Just a little insight won't make this right
It's too late to fight
It ends tonight,
It ends tonight.

Now I'm on my own side
It's better than being on your side
It's my fault when you're blind
It's better that I see it through your eyes

All these thoughts locked inside
Now you're the first to know

When darkness turns to light
It ends tonight,
It ends tonight.
Just a little insight won't make this right
It's too late to fight
It ends tonight,
It ends

When darkness turns to light
It ends tonight,
It ends tonight.
Just a little insight won't make this right
It's too late to fight
It ends tonight,
It ends tonight.

Tonight
Insight
When darkness turns to light,
It ends tonight.

13th and 14th november 2009.... I wont forget those words you told me that day... dont worry, I'm not gonna run around telling every1 about it. I'll keep it for myself... when u are down and sad, I couldn't do anything, but to just play stupid with you, I told u before that I'll be there and support u no matter wat... guess those days wont come back anymore... I've been stupid and selfish, but I dont know what I was doing. Its not about whether I like u or not, I know from the beginning that, I can never be with you.... because my judgement was clouded... I made you sad, and that you hate me... I didnt wanted them to get involved in this matter, but I did, somewhat... now is SPM, its good to see you and aaron still together now everyday... and that u arent down. I know that u're a strong girl after all, u told me before this before.

"=) its ok -.-" orphan is not tat weak >.< well i cant deny tat gals are weaker than guys"

when u're angry, I'd be patient and I never be angry with u. when u're sad, I try my best to calm u down. Like u said ... those time wont come back anymore.... why am I writing this? I dont know... it maybe something I had been holding back all this time.... but... I'm glad I met you... a best friend ... u changed everything I was back then from form 4... I'm neither asking for another chance nor asking u to forgive me... all I can say now... is that I'm sorry orphan( that for the last time ) and I'll never forget all those days we had fun....

DEAD

No nid to say, my sejarah is DEAD, SHIT, luckily I got some points, thank GOD jacky talked about that zaman renaisence (is this right? whatever) the most obvious tokoh, LEONARDO DA VINCI and MICHAELANGELO! shish, these guys wont save me obviously... 2mr EST, not part of it.... add maths, ekonomi, perdagangan, maths, p.moral, account and sains is all thats left.

Shane ward - all my life (love it)
I will never find another lover
Sweeter than you
Sweeter than you
And I will never find another lover
More precious than you
More precious than you

Girl you are
Close to me you're like my mother
Close to me you're like my father
Close to me you're like my sister
Close to me you're like my brother
You are the only one,
You're my everything
And for you this song I sing

[CHORUS]

All my life
I prayed for someone like you
And I thank God that I
That I finally found you

All my life
I prayed for someone like you
And I hope that you
Feel the same way too
Yes, I pray that you do love me too

I said, you're all that I'm thinking of
Baby
Said I promise to never
Fall in love with a stranger
You're all I'm thinking of
I praise the Lord above
For sending me your love
I cherish every hug
I really love you

[CHORUS]

You're all that I ever know
When you smile on my face
All I see is a glow
You turn my life around
You picked me up when I was down

You're all that I ever know
When you smile my face glows
You picked me up when I was down

You're all that I ever know
When you smile my face glows
You picked me up when I was down

And I hope that you
Feel the same way too
Yes I pray that you
Do love me too

[CHORUS (2)]

All my life
I prayed for someone like you
And I thank God that I
That I finally found you

All my life
I prayed for someone like you
Yes, I pray that you do love me too

[CHORUS (2) (repeat 2x)]

yeah yeah... being lifeless again... putting all this songs and what so ever crap stuffs....

It seems like some people have fail my test... (my kind of test, dont ask) but some passed my test ... and gain my trust and respect, I know that you guys wont understand it =P, no matter. This little test of mine seems stupid... I shouldnt have try it at the 1st place.... haiz, banana!! (wtf)
after SPM, it will be bars, fireworks, driving license, shisa (probably cause I always wanted to try it), shits and giggles (wtf AGAIN) and so on, so on. Maybe lose my virginity in the bar ( AS IF LA ) XDXDXPXP

Urgghhh... dunno what to do 2mr....

Ciao y'all
Gary

God always play with everyone's life....

Boys like girls (feat taylor swift) - Two is better than one
I remember what you wore on the first day
You came into my life and I thought
"Hey, you know, this could be something"
'Cause everything you do and words you say
You know that it all takes my breath away
And now I'm left with nothing

'Cause maybe it's true
That I can't live without you
Maybe two is better than one
There's so much time
To figure out the rest of my life
And you thought that it got me coming undone
And I'm thinking two is better than one

I remember every look upon your face
The way you roll your eyes
The way you taste
You make it hard for breathing
'Cause when I close my eyes and drift away
I think of you and everything's okay
I'm finally now believing

That maybe it's true
That I can't live without you
Maybe two is better than one
There's so much time
To figure out the rest of my life
And you thought that it got me coming undone
And I'm thinking two is better than one
Yeah, yeah

I remember what you wore on the first day
You came into my life and I thought, "Hey,"

Maybe it's true
That I can't live without you
Maybe two is better than one
There's so much time
To figure out the rest of my life
And you thought that it got me coming undone
And I'm thinking
I can't live without you
'Cause, baby, two is better than one
There's so much time
To figure out the rest of my life
But I'll figure it out
When it's all said and done
Two is better than one
Two is better than one

I believe... that it is fate that brings and separate 2 people.... but it depends on the choices that you make ... and I made mine... If I choose to stay... I'll bring nothing more but pain, so I had to lie on some stuff... You may never know which am I telling the truth ... because .... I dont feel any trust anymore... that night, I asked god, to give me guidance and tell me wat to do... and I did what he told me to do... I guess if I lie about some stuff ... you may never have to know the truth... and be sad... but in the end, its pain and agony that makes it all gone to pieces...

the phrase "God works in a mysterious way" I begin to understand.... but whats the use anyway... It's too late, I sometimes wished... that HE would reverse time for me... to set everything right... and that it wont happen to the 2nd time... BUT, whats done is done.

yeah, fireworks at the 31st december... I think I'll make my 1st move, hopefully it wont backfire...

Peace out,
Gary

No chance in heaven....

Yeah yeah.... SPM is just 4 more days away.... I can't believe how times fly.... how many silly mistakes I've made.... I would think its beyond stupidity. Have I not met you here ... I wouldnt have hurt you... have I never existed... you and him would be together forever.... everything I did.... I've been selfish inside, maybe its the fear of losing you... I dont know ... funny how god would play with people's life.... I dont blame him ... sometimes I made my decision on my own... and it proves to be harsh, I've been a cold hard bastard.... I knew you were gonna say that word... it was suppose to break me or kill me from the inside... but it didnt, my feelings have been playing with me this few months, deception, manipulation, and etc.... it's like there's a different me inside... goddammit, I should have listen to my father to check with the physician...
I can say ... that I'm mentally retarded now... I dont know how or wat should I do, yeah... I guess I dont deserve to live... how many times have I think of killing myself? I've lost count.

I guess that killing myself now wont solve anything anymore... cause here I am, deal with it. all the times I spent with you ... all the things I did... all gone... I know that you would hate me now, I wanted to be sad but I can't ... I'm emotionless now, heartless and my judgement have been clouded with the screams beneath.... I cant even think straight this few months.... stubborn... to put it that way.

Shane ward - All my life
I will never find another lover sweeter than you, sweeter than you
And I will never find another lover more precious than you, more
precious than you
Girl you are close to me you're like my mother,
Close to me you're like my father,
Close to me you're like my sister,
Close to me you're like my brother
You are the only one my everything and for you this song I sing

All my life I've prayed for someone like you
And I thank God that I, that I finally found you
All my life I've prayed for someone like you
And I hope that you feel the same way too
Yes, I pray that you do love me too

I said you're all that I'm thinking of.....
Said, I promise to never fall in love with a stranger,
You're all I'm thinking of, I praise the Lord above,
For sending me your love, I cherish every hug,
I really love you

All my life,I've prayed for someone like you,
And I thank God that I, that I finally found you,
All my life I've prayed for someone like you
Yes I hope that you feel the same way too
Yes, I pray that you do, love me too

You're all that I ever known, when you smile, on my face, all I see is a glow.
You turned my life around, you picked me up when I was down,
You're all that I ever known, when you smile your face glows
You picked me up when I was down
You're all that I ever known, when you smile on your face all I see is a glow,
You picked me up when I was down and I hope that you feel the same way
too,
Yes I pray that you do love me too

All my life, I've prayed for someone like you,
And I thank God that I, that I finally found you
All my life I've prayed for someone like you
Yes, I pray that you do love me too
All my life I've prayed for someone like you
And I thank God that I, that I finally found you
All my life I've prayed for someone like you
Yes, I pray that you do love me too
[repeat till fade]

God... give me strength.... I need guidance....

Signing off,
Gary

It's all fate....

Nickleback - If everyone cared..

From underneath the trees, we watch the sky
Confusing stars for satellites
I never dreamed that you'd be mine
But here we are, we're here tonight

Singing Amen, I, I'm alive
Singing Amen, I, I'm alive

[Chorus:]
If everyone cared and nobody cried
If everyone loved and nobody lied
If everyone shared and swallowed their pride
Then we'd see the day when nobody died

And I'm singing

Amen I, Amen I, I'm alive
Amen I, Amen I, Amen I, I'm alive

And in the air the fireflies
Our only light in paradise
We'll show the world they were wrong
And teach them all to sing along

Singing Amen, I, I'm alive
Singing Amen, I, I'm alive
(I'm alive)

[Chorus x2]

And as we lie beneath the stars
We realize how small we are
If they could love like you and me
Imagine what the world could be

If everyone cared and nobody cried
If everyone loved and nobody lied
If everyone shared and swallowed their pride
Then we'd see the day when nobody died
When nobody died...

[Chorus]

We'd see the day, we'd see the day
When nobody died
We'd see the day, we'd see the day
When nobody died
We'd see the day when nobody died

all the things happened... it's all fate... I'm not a guy that believes in fate or had alot of faith with GOD... but I'm damn sure he's real alright... funny... how HE likes to play with everyone's life and made them feel hurt ... anyhow ... last night I feel emotionless... no mood... thunder outside... all the sudden tears rolling down of my eyes, I neither feel sad nor down... but I cried alright...

LOLZ jennifer's body really SUCK, story line bad, I dont get 1 fucking shit out of this movie?! and I feel VERY sleepy on this movie~~

Peace out,
Gary

Michael Jackson - This is it
1,2,3,4
This is it, Here I stand
I’m the light of the world
I feel grand
And this love, I can feel
And I know, Yes for sure
It is real

And it feels as though I’ve seen your face a thousand
times
And you said you really know me, yourself
And I know that you have got addicted with you eyes
But you say you’re gonna leave it for yourself

Oh
I never heard a single word about you
Falling in love wasn’t my plan
I never thought that I would be your lover
Come on please just understand

This is it
Like I said
I’m a light of your world
run away
we can feel
This is real
Every time I’m in love yeah I feel

And I feel as though I’ve known you since a thousand
years
And you tell me that you’ve seen my face before
And you said to me that you don’t want me hanging
around
many times wanna do it here before
Oh yeah
I never heard a single word about you
Falling in love wasn’t my plan
I never thought that I would be your lover
Come on please just understand
This is it
I can feel
I’m the light of the world
This is real
feel my song
we can say
And I tell you feel that way

And it feels as though I’ve known you for a thousand
years
And you said you saw my face yourself
And you said want to go with you all the while
And I know that it’s really for myself
Oh yeah
I never heard a single word about you
Falling in love wasn’t my plan
I never thought that I would be your lover
Come on please dear understand

I never heard a single word about you
Falling in love wasn’t my plan
I never thought that I would be your lover
Come on dear please understand
Oh yeah

I never heard a single word about you
Falling in love wasn’t my plan


yeah yeah..... in love again... just 5 days to go SPM, already get another feeling..... I hate this random feelings..... well.... that day at 1borneo... I bluff with gordon she's there, mana tahu really there... YES, this is called fate.... but right after I had a heart wound? .... I really dont know, must be half of that feeling have been gone along time ago.... thanks to them, I know how to let go of it.... but of what course? I dont know does she hate me.... or just afraid things will go wrong like that day again... OKAY, enough about my stupid love problem.

2day... well its class party, have some fun la... but quite boring than expected -.- well they did the best la.... I WONDER, should I post that video of nasrul pole dancing or wat? XD OKAY I WILL !!!! u guys know the rest la... I lazy type all those inside here,

Ciao amigos,
Gary

Feeling sick......

SWT!!!! I'm really feeling sick to my stomach right now zzz GODDAMMIT and l8r I have to go tuition again..... the eeefffffff. Today Audrey got pissed off ... lolz I dont even know how to calm her down ... but just let her be or else she kill me T.T... kena tumbuk also ~~ lucky not slap on the face, THAT IS MORE PAIN!!!! Haha wat to do, people steal her idea and dont appreciate her -.-, I really hate people bully the lil ones, ( no offense sis ) XD. This is something I wanted to write

Okay.... truth is .... I planned it from the start... I didnt know when it will happen ... but it happened alright... I somehow knew that she's going to ask Jacky that question one day.... and that she'll not lie about it... I just play along with this.... I'm not mad of any of my friends 1 ... I know they're trying to help... and help I got it.... When she asked me the question ... I have to say "the chamber have just loosen up" ..... actually it wasnt locked away from my heart at all... I still had that feeling with her.... somehow.... the inside told me "DONT GIVE A DAMN ABOUT AARON!! JUST TAKE HER!!" but I cant submit to it..... long last... I've been in pain.... and I think ... the best way .... is that I stay away from her..... My judgement was clouded heavily... my heart was pierced with almost 4 swords inside.... Okay, I know I'm starting to talk weird here.... what I didnt anticipated.... is that Jacky would say it all to her... and the group would hate her..... I'm sorry in behave of my friends.... they will cool down in time....

I know.... that I would not be the 1 that you can love.... and that I know that u try to make me lose hope on you ... and that I wont be able to get you.... when that night, u told me to leave .... I dont know ..... I respect your decision.... and that this bear left orphan to the 1 you love..... you gave me 1 more chance ... and I've wasted it.... the promise we made .... I had to break it.... but that last promise I wont break... and that is your gift..... when you were sad... I cant be there for you always.... no is to be blamed here .... the person only to blamed ... is me.... I made this thing gone bad to worse.... like THE ROAD NOT TAKEN..... I cant go back to that road anymore... it's my choice..... I have made mine...

Chris Daughtry - Over You
Now that it’s all said and done


I can’t believe you were the one

To build me up and tear me down

Like an old abandoned house

What you said when you left

Just left me cold and out of breath

I fell too far, was in way too deep

Guess I let you get the best of meeee



(Chorus)

Well I never saw it coming

I should have started running

A long, time agooo!

And I never thought I’d doubt you

I’m better off without you

More than you, more than you know

I’m slowly getting closure

I guess it’s really over

I’m finally gettin’ better

Now I’m picking up the pieces

From spending all of these years

Putting my heart back together

‘Cause the day I thought I’d never get through

I got over you!!!

(End Chorus)



You took a hammer to these walls

Dragged the memories down the hall

Packed your bags and walked away

There was nothing I could say,

And when you slammed the front door shut

A lot of other’s opened up

So did my eyes so I could see

That you never were the best for meee



(Chorus)

Well I never saw it coming

I should have started running

A long, time agooo!

And I never thought I’d doubt you

I’m better off without you

More than you, more than you know

I’m slowly getting closure

I guess it’s really over

I’m finally getting’ better

Now I’m picking up the pieces

From spending all of these years

Putting my heart back together

‘Cause the day I thought I’d never get through

I got over you!!!

(End Chorus)



I never saw it coming

I should have started running

A long, long time agooo

And I never thought I’d doubt you

I’m better off without you



And I never saw it coming

I should have started running

I’m finally getting better

Now I’m picking up the pieces

From spending all of these years

Putting my heart back together

And I got over you!!!

And I got over you!!!

And I got over you!!!



The day I thought I’d never get through.
I got over you…

Chris Daughtry - No Suprise

I've practiced this for hours, gone round and round
And now I think that I've got it all down
And as I say it louder I love how it sounds
Cause I'm not taking the easy way out
Not wrapping this in ribbons
Shouldn't have to give a reason why

It's no surprise I won't be here tomorrow
I can't believe that I stayed till today
Yeah you and I will be a tough act to follow
But I know in time we'll find this was no surprise

It came out like a river once I let it out
When I thought that I wouldn't know how
Held onto it forever just pushing it down
Felt so good to let go of it now
Not wrapping this in ribbons
Shouldn't have to give a reason why

It's no surprise I won't be here tomorrow
I can't believe that I stayed till today
There's nothing here in this heart left to borrow
There's nothing here in this soul left to say
Don't be surprised when we hate this tomorrow
God know we tried to find an easier way
Yeah you and I will be a tough act to follow
But I know in time we'll find this was no surprise

Our favorite place we used to go
The warm embrace that no one knows
The loving look that's left your eyes
That's why this comes as no, as no surprise

If I could see the future and how this plays out
I bet it's better than where we are now
But after going through this, it's easier to see the reason why

It's no surprise I won't be here tomorrow
I can't believe that I stayed till today
Yeah you and I will be a tough act to follow
But I know in time we'll find this was no surprise

The kiss goodnight, it comes with me
Both wrong and right, our memories
The whispering before we sleep, just one more thing that you can't keep
Our favorite place we used to go
The warm embrace that no one knows
The loving look that's left your eyes
But I know in time we'll find this was no surprise

just posting a song thats all ...

what i've done?

Linkin Park - What I've done

In this farewell
There's no blood
There's no alibi
Cause I've drawn regret
From the truth
Of a thousand lies

So let mercy come
And wash away

What I've done
I'll face myself
To cross out what I've become
Erase myself
And let go of what I've done

Put to rest
What you thought of me
While I clean this slate
With the hands
Of uncertainty

So let mercy come
And wash away

What I've done
I'll face myself
To cross out what I've become
Erase myself
And let go of what I've done

For what I've done
I start again
And whatever pain may come
Today this ends
I'm forgiving what I've done

I'll face myself
To cross out what I've become
Erase myself
And let go of what I've done

What I've done
Forgiving what I've done

I really dont know what have I done.... why did I met u on the 1st place.... I believed ... that all this time, is god's will to let me get to know you... but now .... I dont know am I defying him... or I'm a following his plan.... maybe all this was meant to be.... what I know is that I'm lucky to have a good friends like you guys... ( you know who I meant ) I'll never forget any of you even if I die... hmph... death....

I may not know what the future is installed for me right now... but I have to forget about you in order to move forward.... I'm sorry that I can't be with you anymore... I hope you'd understand .... you changed my life for the past 2 years since I 1st meet you and know you....back then, other people talk bad things about you... but I never listen to them, I never had my thoughts thinking that u're horrible.... instead I think of you as a lost angel.... an angel that need guidance.... and that you were the one.... of all the girls I met... I never had that feeling before in my entire life... well... I guess this maybe the last thing I would write about you now.... Goodbye.

Signing off,
Gary

heartbreak....

I really dont know now.... I'm feeling sad... but not sad... I feel hot but its cold instead.... I felt cold but its hot.... I'm having a random mood and senses now.... God.... have I've been so blind all this time?! and that all the things I caused is only misery, hate, and sorrowness?! HAVE I DONE SOMETHING WRONG???!!! PLEASE TELL ME!!! ..... she changed everything of my life and on that day I told myself I'm devoted to her and that I vow to be by her side ... to support her whenever she needs me..... and now... I really dont even know where this thing is going.... SPM is around the corner.... I dont want to tell her about how I really felt cause I dont want to put any pressure or burden to her.... but then .... I cant blame you guys for being like that.... I know u guys r trying to help... and that u dont want me to feel sad all the time .... yeah yeah... friends is everything to me... but so does love... if it was u guys to decide? which would you choose? Your future or your friends? sure we can be friends forever .... but there are sometimes that we have to spend our times with our lover too, right? maybe ... idk... its hard for me to choose right now....

I felt bad right now and that its me who have been selfish all this time.... I know you wont read it until SPM ends.... I'll leave you now... as you told me to do.... Thank you for changing my life for the past 2 years.... I wont forget u though.... and I hope that u can make a right decision this time...

This morning, I really dont know what happen to me ... (man, I hate my pimple on my nose -.-, its the 2nd time in 2 years!!!!) Like Jess said la... *Why u having a mood swing?* and aaron also ask *Whats wrong with you?* ... well I dont know really.... lost memory maybe XD, haha... yeah yeah... I got some problems again la... the same problems.... well not much to care la this time.... I mean ... who cares anyway....

Michael Buble - Sway
When marimba rhythms start to play
Dance with me, make me sway
Like a lazy ocean hugs the shore
Hold me close, sway me more

Like a flower bending in the breeze
Bend with me, sway with ease
When we dance you have a way with me
Stay with me, sway with me

Other dancers may be on the floor
Dear, but my eyes will see only you
Only you have that magic technique
When we sway I go weak

I can hear the sounds of violins
Long before it begins
Make me thrill as only you know how
Sway me smooth, sway me now

Other dancers may be on the floor
Dear, but my eyes will see only you
Only you have that magic technique
When we sway I go weak

I can hear the sounds of violins
Long before it begins
Make me thrill as only you know how
Sway me smooth, sway me now
You know how
Sway me smooth, sway me now

SPM 13 more days this and I'm still blogging? wth la.... haiz.... guess somethings cant be forgotten.... she changed everything I am back then.....

Signing off,
Gary