Forget it

Well... 2 of my friends just quit blogging... 1 say she doesn't want to write about her personal life anymore... and the other 1 says change to tumblr... Idk why am I still writing this here... but its the only place I can let it all out... seems like everything is still the same... but over the past weeks, lots of thinking... I think I dont wanna care about it anymore, I just keep the flow going.... driving inovations... keep running, running, and running all the way till I die. It just sucks to keep 1 thing to your head like forever...

The Rasmus - In the shadow

No sleep
No sleep until I'm done with finding the answer
Won't stop
Won't stop before I find a cure for this cancer
Sometimes
I feel like going down and so disconnected
Somehow
I know that I am haunted to be wanted

I've been watching
I've been waiting
In the shadows for my time
I've been searching
I've been living
For tomorrows all my life

In the shadows

They say
That I must learn to kill before I can feel safe
But I
I'd rather kill myself than turn into their slave
Sometimes
I feel that I should go and play with the thunder
Somehow
Cause somehow I just don't wanna stay and wait for a wonder

I've been watching
I've been waiting
In the shadows for my time
I've been searching
I've been living
For tomorrows all my life

Lately I been walking walking in circles, watching, waiting for something
Feel me, touch me, heal me, come take me higher

I've been watching
I've been waiting
In the shadows all my time
I've been searching
I've been living
For tomorrows all my life
I've been watching
I've been waiting
I've been searching
I've been living
For tomorrows

In the shadows

I've been waiting

THIS SONG SAYS IT ALL, PEACE!
Gary aka teddy bear

BSB - What makes you different

You don't run with the crowd
You go your own way
You don't play after dark
You light up my day
Got your own kind of style
That sets you apart
Baby, that's why you captured my heart

I know sometimes you feel like you don't fit in
And this world doesn't know what you have within
When I look at you, I see something rare
A rose that can grow anywhere (grow anywhere)
And there's no one I know that can compare

What makes you different, (alright) makes you beautiful (alright)
What's there inside you, (alright) shines through to me
In your eyes I see, all the love I'll ever need
You're all I need, oh girl
What makes you different, makes you beautiful to me

Hey, yeah yeah yeah
You got something so real
You touched me so deep (touched me so deep)
You see material things
Don't matter to me
So come as you are
You've got nothing to prove
You've won me with all that you do
And I wanna take this chance to say to you

What makes you different, (alright, yeah yeah) makes you beautiful (alright)
What's there inside you, (alright) shines through to me
In your eyes I see, all the love I'll ever need
You're all I need, oh girl
What makes you different, makes you beautiful

You don't know (you don't know) how you touched my life (touched my life)
Oh in so many ways (so many ways) I just can't describe
You taught me what love is supposed to be
It's all the little things that make you beautiful to me (so beautiful)
Oh yeah, yeah

What makes you,
What makes you different, (what makes) makes you beautiful (to me)
What's there inside you, (there shines) shines through to me
In your eyes I see, all the love I'll ever need
You're all I need, oh girl
What makes you different, makes you beautiful to me

Everything you do is beautiful (so beautiful)
Love you give shines right through me (shines right through to me)
Everything you do is beautiful (ooh, ooh ooh ooh oh)
Oh, you're beautiful to me (to me)...

This song says it...(just posting a lyrics, I know, I'm being lifeless)

Signing off,
Gary aka teddy bear, XD

Weird dreams...

Chris Daughtry - Life after you

Ten miles from town and I just broke down
Spittin' out smoke on the side of the road
I'm out here alone just tryin' to get home
To tell you I was wrong but you already know

Believe me I won't stop at nothin'
To see you so I've started runnin'

All that I'm after is a life full of laughter
As long as I'm laughin' with you
I'm thinkin' that all that still matters is love ever after
After the life we've been through
'Cause I know there's no life after you

Last time we talked, the night that I walked
Burns like an iron in the back of my mind
I must've been high to say you and I
Weren't meant to be and just wastin' my time

Oh, why did I ever doubt you?
You know I would die here without you

All that I'm after is a life full of laughter
As long as I'm laughin' with you
I'm thinkin' that all that still matters is love ever after
After the life we've been through
'Cause I know there's no life after you

You and I, right or wrong, there's no other one
After this time I spent alone
It's hard to believe that a man with sight could be so blind
Thinkin' 'bout the better times, must've been outta my mind
So I'm runnin' back to tell you

All that I'm after is a life full of laughter
Without you God knows what I'd do, yeah

All that I'm after is a life full of laughter
As long as I'm laughin' with you
I'm thinkin' 'bout all that still matters is love ever after
After the life we've been through, yeah
Know there's no life after you

Know there's no life after you
Know there's no life after you
Know there's no life after you
Know there's no life after you
Know there's no life after you
Know there's no life after you
Know there's no life after you, yeah

Damn... same dream occurs to me last night... I dont even dare to sleep tonight.... wat dream? the same dream, of course, but there's 2 more I dreamt of ... 1 is I was on a wedding, Idk whose wedding, image was so blur... and everything I hear was sonic wave... I was on some kind of church *the cross sign was clear* ... then skipped the other part... I saw 6 bodies on the ground... blood on my hand, carrying a knife and a gun... I dont know who are those lying on the ground... then I see my own hand move, pointing the gun to my head, I tried to stop it and ... that made me woke up T.T.... wtf.... what kind of dream is that idk...

Signing off
Gary aka teddy bear *still*

Linkin Park - Given up

Wake in a sweat again
Another day's been laid to waste
In my disgrace

Stuck in my head again
Feels like I'll never leave this place
There's no escape

I'm my own worst enemy

[chorus]
I've given up
I'm sick of feeling
Is there nothing you can say

Take this all away
I'm suffocating
Tell me what the fuck is wrong
With me
[end chorus]

I don't know what to take
Thought I was focused but I'm scared
I'm not prepared

I hyperventilate
Looking for help somehow somewhere
And no one cares

I'm my own worst enemy

[chorus]
I've given up
I'm sick of feeling
Is there nothing you can say

Take this all away
I'm suffocating
Tell me what the fuck is wrong
With me
[end chorus]

[bridge]
Goddddddd!!!!

Put me out of my misery
Put me out of my misery
Put me out of my
Put me out of my fucking misery
[end bridge]

[chorus]
I've given up
I'm sick of feeling
Is there nothing you can say

Take this all away
I'm suffocating
Tell me what the fuck is wrong
With me
[end chorus]

this song made me cool down abit, WHEW... lol, I guess too much pressure on work... fillin delivery orders... making cash bills, carrying box, so on, so on, dont really know what to write... hmmm....

 Here's yak, and it miss u XD

Signing off,
Gary

Endless pain

BSB - Helpless when she smiles..

She keeps the secrets in her eyes
She wraps the truth inside her lies
And just when I can't take what she's done to me
She comes to me
And leads me back to paradise

She's so hard to hold
But I can't let go

I'm a house of cards in a hurricane
A reckless ride in the pouring rain
She cuts me and the pain is all I wanna feel
She dances away just like a child
She drives me crazy, drives me wild
But I'm helpless when she smiles (oh when she smiles.. she smiles..)

Maybe I'd fight it if I could (Maybe I'd fight it if I could)
It hurts so bad, but feels so good
She opens up just like a rose to me
When she's close to me
Anything she asked me to, I would

It's out of control
But I can't let go

I'm a house of cards in a hurricane
A reckless ride in the pouring rain
She cuts me and the pain is all I wanna feel
She dances away just like a child
She drives me crazy, drives me wild
But I'm helpless when she smiles (oh no.. when she smiles..)

When she looks at me (When she looks at me)
I get so weak

I'm a house of cards in a hurricane
A reckless ride in the pouring rain
She cuts me and the pain is all I wanna feel
She dances away just like a child
She drives me crazy, drives me wild
But I'm helpless when she smiles (oh when she smiles... when she smiles.. she smiles.....)

I dont know what to do anymore.. It really pains me, everytime I went to bed, I dont feel calm or comfy... its like sleeping on a bed full of spikes... I'm getting awry and crazy everytime now... can't think straight... fight with parents for no reason and all.. idk... I feel weak.. I wish I could have just gone to my eternal slumber that day.... why didn't I do it? ... why... god... I dont know... it kills me inside... i want it to end... how...

It's been awhile since I write this blog... lolz, reason? lazy and tired because I work from morning, who doesn't get tired from that -.-... technicilly I got nothing to write, let's see... 14th february go nz travel... 26th feb go for paintball... and maybe mid march to climb mount kinabalu *DAYEM* those 2 plans are not mine, their jacky's~~~ .... god, I feel so lifeless now .... I miss school, miss everything except the teachers and the studies... no, no, NO, I dont miss pengetua except I miss critising his bird nest *his head* XD. well wth, I may as well go kl by mid year... or stay here, I'm still considering... its not that I dont want to go kl to continue my studies... just, sth is holding me back.... Idk what it is.... and it seems like I haven't found the answer I've been looking for... but I'll try to find it again...

Jet - Shine on
Please don't cry
You know I'm leaving here tonight
Before I go I want you to know that there will always be a light

And if the moon had to runaway
And all the stars didn't wanna play
Don't waste the sun on a rainy day
The wind will soon blow it all away

So many times I'd planned
To be much more than who I am
And if I let you down I will follow you 'round until you understand

That if the moon had to runaway
And all the stars didn't wanna play
Don't waste the sun on a rainy day
The wind will soon blow it all away

When the days all seem the same
Don't feel the cold or wind or rain
Everything will be okay
We will meet again one day
I will shine on, for everyone

So please don't cry
Although I leave you here this night
Where ever I may go how far I don't know
But I will always be your light

That if the moon had to runaway
And all the stars didn't wanna play
Don't waste the sun on a rainy day
The wind will soon blow it all away

When the days all seem the same
Don't feel the cold or wind or rain
Everything will be okay
We will meet again one day
I will shine on, for everyone
When the days all seem the same
Don't feel the cold or wind or rain
Everything will be okay
We will meet again one day
I will shine on, for everyone

Signing off,
Gary

Jesse Mccartney - Just so you know
I shouldn't love you but I want to
I just can't turn away
I shouldn't see you but I can't move
I can't look away

I shouldn't love you but I want to
I just can't turn away
I shouldn't see you but I can't move
I can't look away

And I don't know how to be fine when I'm not
'Cause I don't know how to make a feeling stop

[Chorus:]
Just so you know
This feeling's taking control of me
And I can't help it
I won't sit around, I can't let him win now
Thought you should know
I've tried my best to let go of you
But I don't want to
I just gotta say it all
Before I go
Just so you know

It's getting hard to be around you
There's so much I can't say
Do you want me to hide the feelings
And look the other way

And I don't know how to be fine when I'm not
'Cause I don't know how to make a feeling stop

[Chorus]

This emptiness is killing me
And I'm wondering why I've waited so long
Looking back I realize
It was always there just never spoken
I'm waiting here...been waiting here

[Chorus]

Michael learns to rock - Complicated heart
Don't know what to say now
don't know where to start
I don't know how to handle
a complicated heart
You tell me you are leaving
but I just have to say
before you throw it all away

Chorus:
Even if you want to go alone
I will be waiting when you're coming home
And if you need someone to ease the pain
you can lean on me, my love will still remain

Don't know what you're thinking
to me it seems quite tough
to hold a conversation
when words are not enough
so this is your decision
and there's nothing I can do
I can only say to you

Chorus~

if this is your decision
and theres nothing i can do
i can only say to you

Chorus~

even if you want to go alone
i will still love you when tomorrow comes
Chorus:-

can't believe it.... why?!

Not a perfect person

Hoobastank - The Reason

I'm not a perfect person
There's many things I wish I didn't do
But I continue learning
I never meant to do those things to you
And so I have to say before I go
That I just want you to know

I've found a reason for me
To change who I used to be
A reason to start over new
and the reason is you

I'm sorry that I hurt you
It's something I must live with every day
And all the pain I put you through
I wish that I could take it all away
And be the one who catches all your tears
That's why I need you to hear

I've found a reason for me
To change who I used to be
A reason to start over new
and the reason is you [x4]

I'm not a perfect person
I never meant to do those things to you
And so I have to say before I go
That I just want you to know

I've found a reason for me
To change who I used to be
A reason to start over new
and the reason is you

I've found a reason to show
A side of me you didn't know
A reason for all that I do
And the reason is you

Few days work here alreadi... yeah.. I would say it, *MY JOB SUCKS LOL*

MLTR - 25 minutes
After some time I've finally made up my mind
she is the girl and I really want to make her mine
I'm searching everywhere to find her again
to tell her I love her
and I'm sorry 'bout the things I've done

I find her standing in front of the church
the only place in town where I didn't search
She looks so happy in her weddingdress
but she's crying while she's saying this

Chorus: Boy I've missed your kisses all the time but this is
twentyfive minutes too late
Though you travelled so far boy I'm sorry your are
twentyfive minutes too late

Against the wind I'm going home again
wishing me back to the time when we were more than friends

But still I see her in front of the church
the only place in town where I didn't search
She looked so happy in her weddingdress
but she cryed while she was saying this

Chorus:
Boy I've missed your kisses all the time but this is
twentyfive minutes too late
Though you travelled so far boy I'm sorry your are
twentyfive minutes too late

Out in the streets
places where hungry hearts have nothing to eat
inside my head
still I can hear the words she said

Chorus:
Boy I've missed your kisses all the time but this is
twentyfive minutes too late
Though you travelled so far boy I'm sorry your are
twentyfive minutes too late

I can still hear her say.......